The sound of a launch countdown and a spaceship launch fades
in, continuing as the announcer begins to speak.

ANNOUNCER
A single starship blast off into
the uncharted beyond. One man
pilots along the razors edge of the
known universe, braving every peril
he encounters. That's right, radio
listeners, set your radio for the
year 3000 it's
(with echo)
Buck Justice! Space Cowboy!

Sounds of launch and ship flying fade out

ANNOUNCER (CONT'D)
Chapter 219, The Kings Ruling. When
we last left Buck, he had
sucessfully navigated the Deljerian
Asteroid Maze, only to find Lord
Xaghaghazhine and his fleet of
Qoklamilian Star Blasters waiting
in ambush. Now, about to be
sentenced to his death, Buck is
brought before Docat Qif Sugal,
King of the Qoklamilians

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
(taunting)
Buck Justice, it's been a long time
since you've graced my court. We've
missed your space cowboy antics in
this part of the astrogalaxy

BUCK JUSTICE
The last time I was here I believe
I escaped your incompetent guards
and made off with your daughter,
the lovely Princess Lax Fuh Lhonks.
How long ago was that?

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
(angry)
Enough! For that insult, and for
all your crimes of treason against
the Qoklamilian Democrapublic, you
shall pay dearly.

ANNOUNCER
King Docat Quif Sugal quickly pulls
out a drawstring pouch from under
his flowing Dlarkskin robe, opens
the sinch, and presents it to Buck.

BUCK JUSTICE
What's this? Some sort of Kandorian
Death Bag?

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
(laughing)
My friend, do you think a member of
the Qoklamilian royalty such as
myself would resort to such base
trickery?

BUCK JUSTICE
(interjecting)
Yes

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
(ignoring interruption)
This is the Qoklamilian Bag Of
Truths. Every prisoner of our
Democrapublic is required by
mandate to share a secret, a
personal memory, something to shame
them as they have shamed our proud
race.

BUCK JUSTICE
Oookay I suppose

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
So reach your hand in and pick out
a block of truth. On each block is
written a question, a request, a
command for something personal and
memorable from you.

BUCK JUSTICE
Alright, that doesn't sound that
bad. What's the worst you could ask
me?

We hear Buck rifling through the bag

BUCK JUSTICE (CONT'D)
(reading the block)
"Describe your first kiss"? That's
it?

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
(laughing maniacally)
Won't that be awkward for you?!

BUCK JUSTICE
(increasingly nostalgic as
he speaks)
No. So lets see, my first kiss. I
think I was 13, shortly before I
enrolled at the Spacecademy. There
was this girl that lived in the
Astropartment next door to my
family. Jamie Parsons was here
name. I doubt I'll ever forget that
name. Anyway, we used to go for
walks around the complex talking
and holding hands. This particular
night, there was a battle going on
above the planet and we were
sitting on the astroturf watching
the fireworks in the sky when she
leaned over and gave me a kiss. It
was quick and innocent, but back
then it was the greatest moment of
my life.

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
That's a touching story, Mr
Justice.

BUCK JUSTICE
Well thank you. So...is that it?

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
Almost, just one more thing.

BUCK JUSTICE
What's that?

KING DOCAT QIF SUGAL
Guards, take him to the firing
squad.

Suspenseful orchestra hit plays

FADE OUT.

James,

Hope you enjoy your vacation. After that whole Marcus Switchen affair, you've earned a week or two to yourself. Get yourself some sun. Enjoy a tropical drink or ten. Enjoy some of the local colour. Meet a nice girl and try not to put her in a position where she might get sliced in half with a laser or blasted off into space.

And James, I shouldn't have to remind you, but you're off duty. Try not to kill anyone.

Happy travels,
-M

Ah, nice of M to write. Work's been a bloody mess since the new year, literally and figuratively. Christ, Bond, you've almost died nine times this year, and it's only mid June. No one can go that long without some sort of a break. So just relax, listen to the waves lapping onto the shore, and savor every sip of whatever it is this gorgeous little native girl keeps bringing you.

What was her name? Something that hardly rolled off the tongue, I'm sure. Began with an A I think- Wait! What is that? Just on the horizon. Good lord, is that a naval attack fleet? Where the hell are my binoculars? I could have sworn I- there they are. Russians. But what are they doing off the coast of Barbados? I should phone M.

Wait. No. I'm on vacation. Just put the sunglasses back on, lay back in your chair. This isn't your battle. Just close your eyes, Bond, get some rest, ignore the pontoons racing towards the shore, you're in a safe place now. Pay no attention to the armed men pouring out of the pontoons, they're not going to bother you. They're racing past you now, don't open your- ok, you opened your eyes, but don't make- ok, just wave, smile, be cordial, they'll leave you alone, I'm sure.

Oh good. They're gone now, no doubt razing the nearby towns. You've napped through louder explosions in the past, Bond, and you can do it again. Give it a shot. Zzzzzzz...

M,

Having a great time in Barbados. Heard that you sent a few 00's down here to sort this whole Russian thing out. They seemed a little miffed that I didn't lend them a hand, but, you know, Off duty and that. I guess it's true, everyone hates a guy on vacation.

What ho,
-Bond